
Dear Willard College Team!
Allow me to introduce myself. Hello. My name is Babs “Pickle” Spiker and I have been appointed as Vice President of Bitcoin operations. Effective tomorrow, Willard College will start what I think everyone will agree is a visionary and bold new chapter in our history. Bitcoin mining will earn the college anywhere in the ball park of -$13,500,000 to $36,000,000. I’m new to this exciting new industry, but from what I gather, it will cause a bit of a pull from our electrical grid and IT capacity. During high price moments, the campus will go dark and there will be no computer service available. We apologize that during these draw downs, there will be no warning so please remember to save anything you have on computers frequently. Each student will be provided with a candle and a small box of matches on Sunday evening. This candle is expected to last the entire week.
If none of this makes sense to you, don’t worry. Just get ready for rolling campus blackouts and for the cash to roll in!
Sincerely, and I mean it, Babs “Pickle” Spiker