I didn’t slave away at the Health Center for 63 years to be tossed to the curb. The previous news about my resignation is a LIE. I’ve locked myself into my office and until they cut off the power I will continue to defend my reputation and job from that bastard Dr. Henry Co………………..

Dear Faculty and Staff,

Effective this morning, Dr. Faux resigned as director of the Willard College Health Center. Dr. Faux has been with Willard College for 63 years, since we were a psychiatric hospital and so we see in his resignation that last bridge to the past departing. Dr. Faux’s pioneering work in leucotomy raised his profile nationally. Dr. Faux was successful in cutting costs and helping students to not seek out unnecessary and unnecessarily costly medical interventions. Dr. Faux was also the sole medical staff at our Health Center so please direct students to the Sylvester County Hospital for any life-threatening or routine medical concerns.

Thanks again Dr. Faux!

Love, Dr. Henry Cotton

Willard College excitedly welcomes our new Provost of Students. In his spare time, Provost of Students collects  nineteenth-century dental instruments, manages his four passports, each with a different name and nationality, and visits laundromats, nail salons, and car washes.

Dear Faculty, A gentle reminder to look at Dr. Cotton’s memorandum regarding Pepper McGhee, a senior football athlete student player and the son of Daisy and Wilsson McGhee (Willard College ’86) is not getting anything below an A- this semester. This message has been approved by Dr. Cotton.

Sincerely,

The Department of Athletics and Alumni Affiars

Dear Faculty, The English Department has been suspended pending a report on the cause of a late-night fire that consumed their facilities. If you have any leads to as which English faculty member started the fire, please contact me at esoved@willard.edu

Sincerely, Dean of Faculty Provosts, Elizabeth Soved, PhD

Are you searching for your authentic self? Does your authenticity lag behind your colleagues? Is your authentic person hiding behind a shroud of other people, other personalities? Who are you? And how does this impact your deep and authentic voice as an impassioned instructor, top researcher, and ambassador of the Willard College Brand? Please join President Dr. Henry Cotton and his life partner, Cheryl Tina Faye Cotton, director of Psychological Services, for a ten hour workshop. Spots in the “Authenticity Training Workshop: From the Who to the I?” are going fast.