Associate Vice Provost Milton Vandergrind Announces Preliminary COVID Plans

Dear Colleagues, While we continue to hash out the details of what the Fall semester will look like, we are excited to announce sever preliminary steps that we feel will enhance our capacity, ease transitions and pivots, and to provide us some initial benchmarks.

  1. Renovate and increase capacity of the old Willard Asylum morgue
  2. Purchase a new backhoe for increasing our capacity to dig graves
  3. Renovate the old asylum cemetery and assess new burial sites
  4. Restart Athletics program

Please keep an eye on your email over the summer for more updates!

Sincerely, Associate Vice Provost Milton Vandergrind

5 thoughts on “Associate Vice Provost Milton Vandergrind Announces Preliminary COVID Plans

  1. Blinky Palermo

    They shouldn’t have fired all those contingent faculty. They are cheaper than backhoes.

  2. I applaud this science-based approach!

  3. Charles Ablard

    blockquote, div.yahoo_quoted { margin-left: 0 !important; border-left:1px #715FFA solid !important; padding-left:1ex !important; background-color:white !important; } Milton:  Are you sick, guy?

    Sent from Yahoo Mail for iPad

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