Willard College’s New Major: Bachelor in Language Management

Diplomatic Protocol Circular

After a busy July planning, hiring, repurposing, and rescheduling, Willard College proudly announces the inauguration of the Bachelor in Language Management! As the classic liberal arts programs have proven themselves to be increasingly irrelevant, and even hated in some quarters, Willard College decisively moved forward to create a new major that responds to the vital needs of government and private entities. Colleges, corporations, the armed forces, all levels of government, public schools, etc. are desperate to hire people trained in the art of managing the message, keeping organizations on the message, and, most importantly, being able to massage the message when circumstances change.  BLM major will be trained in the art of the bullet p0ints, the talking points, and other points.

Sincerely, Henry Cotton, President of Willard College

7 thoughts on “Willard College’s New Major: Bachelor in Language Management

  1. this shows much dedication, insight and foresight by you and the loyal private servants dedicated to the willard mission (brilliant diplomatic circular memorandum protocol, henry)…dare i say, revolutionary work …of sorts…! let us lead in efficiencizing the globe through language.

  2. Cheryl Tina Fey

    Dear Hank,
    Oh really – is this some passive aggressive way to deal with the fact that you not understand the divorce papers you were recently served?

    My lawyer will be in touch if you try to use the deciphering of the divorce papers as a class project.

  3. dont know you , but cheryl tina you may benefit from a bit of massaging the message, bulletpointing the divorce elements, am sure hank is planning on workshops soon…or better yet, a retreat?

  4. There are literally (and I do mean literally – I know how to use words!) gazillions of jobs as social media strategists out there just waiting for applicants. Williard hit it again!

  5. […] Masters of Arts in Administrative Communication. This course of study builds on our well-regarded Bachelor of Arts in Language Management and graduates of that program will be given special consideration in their applications. We […]

  6. […] Communication program, to the Assessment and Accreditation Review Committee, or to the Bachelor of Arts in Language Management program. Faculty who are not rerouted to one of those units can expect to receive an additional […]

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