Dear Provost Pillow,

As we think about cost-cutting at Willard College in light of the tidal wave of law suits that former General Counsel Hector Nancy has tossed at us, my gaze has turned towards the Admissions Office. Can you think of any reason that their work couldn’t be handle by a part-time temp? Or perhaps an enterprising business or marketing student who is interested in learning how to determine people’s income and assets? How quickly can the staff be let go and the office’s equipment sold off? Is a week too quick a timetable? Also, can you dig up that proposal from a few years ago about getting students to earn credit for hauling out their own trash?

We are at a critical juncture at this institution so we don’t need one good idea but rather dozens of mediocre and even bad ideas. I’m done with trying to find “the” idea. Let’s just do anything that crosses our mind. It has to work. It has to.

President Henry Cotton