
Dear Beloved Community,
Objects, of undetermined origin and nature, have been located in the Willard College Swimming Pool which has been closed for the foreseeable future. If anyone saw anyone, or anything, that might be considered suspect at the pool yesterday, please contact head lifeguard Byron “Sammy” McDanielsberg.
We know this is disappointing the numerous kids attending summer camps at Willard College! Sorry.
Meanwhile, have a great summer.
Dr. Colney Hatch, Vice President of Marketing and Development
Vandergrind did it with a naughty naughty knick knack! That is one icky provost!